“Well, it’s one louder, isn’t it? It’s not ten. You see, most blokes, you know, will be playing at ten. You’re on ten here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you’re on ten on your guitar. Where can you go from there? Where? Nowhere. Exactly. What we do, is if we need that extra push over the cliff, you know what we do? Eleven. Exactly. One louder.” – Nigel Tufnel

I hate top 10 lists. Really, I do. I didn’t always. But really, it’s so over. These days, whenever I see anyone put out a top 10 list, I think “well there’s another unthinking lemming just following the herd who should probably be paying David Letterman some kind of royalty fee.”

So without further adieu, following is my top ELEVEN list of nonsensical top 10 lists. I’m not going to concur with or object to any of the specific rankings or exclusions on any of these top 10 lists or even rank the lists themselves because, frankly, I’m above that. Here we go: