Grigory Pasko: Dialogue of the mannequins

Pre-election stories from the hagiography of the Great and Inimitable Vladimir Putin – and this has been noticed not just by me for a long time already- have begun to appear more and more often in the Russian mass information media. You may recall that earlier this summer, before he was putting out wildfires from the safety of a posh airplane, Putin found the time to met with bikers (Russians hadn’t even heard of such a word as “baikyer” until recently; and also play host to the bungling and spectacularly fallen spies and sang the song “Where does the Motherland begin?” with them…

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But the burdens of the prime minister are many, and he also had to spend his summer attending to diplomatic duies – such as a meeting with president of Ukraine Vitkor Yanukovich. I could not read the reports about this «historic» event without tears welling up in my eyes. In my imagination their conversation probably unfolded like this:

Putin (P.): – Hello! I’m glad to see you!

Yanukovich (Y.): – And how glad I am to see you!

P:- I’re glad that you’re glad!

Y: – Ah but how glad I am that I’m glad you’re glad!!

P: – I’m glad that we’re both glad. Let’s talk about our gladness.

Y: – Of course! I’m glad that our countries have economies!

P: – I’m glad too. It would be good to raise the economies of our countries!

Y: – It wouldn’t be bad. But concrete mechanisms are needed.

P: – Yes, needed. Without the creation of concrete mechanisms it is impossible to do this.

Y: – A session of an inter-state commission needs to be conducted.

P: – By the way, the bikers say hi. They’re glad too.

Y: – And I’m glad too, that they’re glad. What’s a – biker?

P: – That’s a participant in a bike-show.

Y: – What, they tell bayki? Hey, we know how to do that too. (Laughs).

P: – (Laughs)

Y: – I’m glad that we’re together on this day.

P:-What day is it today?

Y: – Well, but tomorrow is the day of the military marine fleet [the navy]!

P: – Ah, well yes. Our fleet. There is something to talk about here.

Y: – Yes, a session of an inter-state commission needs to be conducted.

P: – ..And concrete mechanisms outlined. And to move out towards an extending of joint work.

Y: – Yes, there is movement forward in many directions. And I’m glad about this.

P: – And how glad I am! (Looks at Ulysse Nardin watch). Well, gotta go. The bikers are waiting.

Y: – I’ve gotta go too. Have to work out concrete mechanisms.
(They go off).

An example of an official report about this circus dialog – here

When I read (hear) such reports about such meetings ” on high”, then I think involuntarily: either the people writing this stuff – are complete and total idiots, or participants in the dialog. Tertium non datur.

…And they are soon going to propose to us at the next elections to vote for one of the mannequins.